The Illusion of Control


Frightened. Humbled. Unnerved.

A range of emotions swirled in my heart as I watched the storm rage outside. This hurricane, which had inspired so much fear and left devastation in her wake, Hurricane Irma – she was a mere tropical storm when she reached us. Still, those winds…overturned-2260715_1280

The rain fell at a 45 degree angle. We heard trees come down as we braced ourselves for what might come next.

The power flickered nearly a dozen times before finally going out completely. Everything became quiet and still. All we heard was the storm and the sound of each other’s voices.

We had expected to lose power. We were prepared, our kitchen stocked with soup, ramen noodles, trail mix and bottled water.

But as the hours stretched on, time seemed to slow down. Minutes turned into hours and hours into days. Four very long days before the electricity came back on.

Do you know what I missed the most?


I missed the ability to flip a switch and watch the darkness vanish instantaneously.

Light makes it easier to do the simple stuff – like open a can of soup, or find that utensil I just dropped on the floor, or bathe my child. It prevents stumbling over toys left on the floor. It helps with eating and reading and pretty much everything else daily life requires.

During those four days of darkness, God who is light illuminated some dark corners of my heart. Areas I didn’t realize I felt such a need to control –

  • My routine and the smooth running of the day
  • The way in which things get done
  • When and what we eat
  • A whole lot of other daily life details

I guess control is really just an illusion. All it takes is a loss of electricity and suddenly, I’m no longer in control.

But God is, always.

And the longer I know Him, the more I realize that’s a good thing. His heart is kind and full of love. He works everything for the good of His own – even when we can’t see how that’s possible.

When the proverbial reins are taken from our hands, everything slows down and all that’s extraneous gets stripped away. We’re free to look with fresh eyes on the life God has given us.

“How great is Your goodness, which You have stored up for those who fear You…” (Psalm 31:19).

Sometimes life is decidedly not good.

“Little” annoyances can drive us crazy – like four days without electricity. On those days, God offers to carry our burdens so we can rest in His control.

Other times life comes unraveled and the daily pain is excruciating. But God Himself is unchangeably good, even when life is not. He is near to the brokenhearted and invites us to find rest near His heart.

God…Light in our darkness. Sovereign in our craziness. Healer, Sustainer, Miracle worker, the Giver of every good gift.

For what attribute of God are you thankful today? How do you see Him meeting your needs today? In what areas do you need to rest in His control?

I’d love hear! Please leave a comment below.


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