by MeredithNMills | Jun 19, 2017 | abiding in Christ, Family, Uncategorized, Walking by Faith
Things are changing around here.
It’s a highlight of every year for me, the writing conference I attended a few weeks ago. I love the drive into the Blue Ridge Mountains. I love the conference center’s picturesque setting. I love connecting with old friends and making new ones. I love learning tools of the trade that help me grow as a writer. Most of all, I love retreating from the noise of daily life and tuning my heart to the still, small voice of God.
This year was particularly good.
After three years of blogging here and a few years contributing to various ministries around the web (Just18Summers, ChristianDevotions, BrokenButPriceless), I’ve decided to write a book. I met with several industry professionals at the conference and pitched my idea. Two agents and a publishing house invited me to send them more information, something they called a proposal.
That sounded like no big deal. Something I could put together in a few days and send off within the week. (Yes, all my seasoned writer friends – I have much to learn!)
Then I looked at a sample proposal from one of those agents.
Turns out, it’s a pretty big deal.
Like 20+ pages talking about the book yet in progress, with lots of research needed ahead of time. I was a bit overwhelmed, but got right to work.
One of the main areas I needed to research was my target audience – those for whom I am writing. As my book is a devotional for mothers, the main readers are moms of babies to preteens, as well as others who spend significant time with kids in that age range – specifically teachers and grandparents.
I posted a survey to Facebook, with 20 getting-to-know-you questions. (If you missed it, you can still take the survey here.) I was thrilled to receive a large response, giving tremendous insight into the hearts and lives of over 80 moms, teachers and grandparents.
Guess what I learned?
We who love little ones have a whole lot in common.
While many described themselves as happy, they also said they’re overwhelmed, anxious, discouraged and exhausted. I totally get that. Nearly every word chosen to “describe your emotions within the last six months” could be used of me, too.
For many of us, though, our weariness goes beyond the physical.
Sometimes I feel my soul is tired.
Maybe it’s our busy schedule. Maybe it’s our constant connectedness on social media. Maybe it’s a lack of true rest during “down time.” Whatever the cause, whatever the life season, it seems we all experience it.
As I’ve pondered this common problem, Jesus’ words in Matthew 11:28-30 once again stand out. “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Can I be honest here? I used to doubt Jesus’ words in that passage. They seemed almost to mock me. My Christian life was anything but restful. And Jesus’ burden light? That wasn’t my experience.
Ironically, when I hit a proverbial wall and my good girl life crumbled, that’s when I found rest. (For the full story, check out Confessions of a Good Girl.) In my broken, burned-out state Jesus pulled me close and showed me His dazzlingly beautiful, gentle and humble heart.
I found rest in the nearness of God. In better understanding His heart of grace. In seeing myself through His eyes and finding acceptance through Christ.
Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me
He taught me that all of life is to be lived from that place of soul rest.
Like two oxen sharing the same yoke, Christianity’s essence is connectedness to Christ. We are participators, but the good works are His. He initiates what He wants done. He empowers us to do it. He produces His fruit in and through us.
What a relief to find it’s not up to me!
Yes, life is exhausting. There are people to serve, families to love, schedules to keep. Our hearts get battered and bruised and sometimes we feel like giving up. Cultivating endurance is no easy task.
But in all our toil, God offers us rest through ever-deepening closeness with Him.
This has become a new theme in my life.
The look here at Dazzled By The Son now spotlights that life change. I’m also going to try a new format for my regular blog posts. Since Jesus is the Source of rest, let’s get to know Him better – together. Let’s take single attributes of God, mull them over, ask questions and share thoughts gleaned from our own study of His Word.
Will you join me?
Comment below if there’s a particular quality of God you’d like to discuss, or if you want to explore how God’s character affects a specific problem or situation. I can’t wait to go deeper with Him – and you!
Related Posts:
Rest for the Restless
On Rest and Quiet Time
What I Learned from the Kid Who Fell Out of the Car
by MeredithNMills | Sep 30, 2015 | Uncategorized
The secret is out. This is the real me.
A few weeks ago, we joined a homeschool co-op. I prepped my kids ahead of time…reminding them to be friendly, to be interested in others, to introduce themselves. You know, basic friend-making stuff. But inwardly, I was a bit anxious myself. I’m not naturally outgoing. Being the first to introduce myself is not exactly in my comfort zone. I, too, was hoping to make connections that would lead to new friendships.
I guess I was hoping to impress people, to make them like me.
You can imagine my embarrassment when, at the end of the first day, I had to search for my misplaced phone. I found it in the office. Assuming someone had turned it in, I asked where it had been found. The sweet lady gave me a puzzled look and told me it had been sitting on the desk all morning. Only then did I remember that I had come to the office first thing that morning in search of name tags. Hmmm….well, she’s not going to think of me as the most organized person in the group.
But really, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Anyone can misplace their phone. (I just happen to do it all the time!)
However, when this same person locks her keys in the car the very next week…Well, the secret is out. This is the real me.
I spent nearly the entire final period in the parking lot waiting for a locksmith. The locksmith, of course, showed up in a huge conspicuous tow truck, just as classes were letting out and people were coming to their cars. He was a jolly fellow – asked how my day was going, as if locking oneself out of one’s car adds humor and excitement to the day.
I guess I should have smiled about it, laughed it off. But I was too worried about what people were thinking.
Ah, people pleasing. I know it well.
It can be paralyzing at times. I spend so much time trying to keep everyone happy. I work hard to make people think well of me – even when it means hiding my quirks and imperfections.
It’s an exhausting way to live, and God is teaching me that we were never designed to live this way.
Can I share with you what I’m learning? Because maybe, just maybe, I’m not alone in this people-pleasing craziness.
First, a person’s value lies not in what we do (or don’t do), but in who we are. Our Maker says we are “remarkably and wonderfully made” (Ps 139:14 HCSB). We bear the image of God (Gen 1:26-27). We are infinitely loved and valued – not because of our own merit or loveliness, but because God has set His love upon us (Eph 2:4-5).
Second, we all have emotional needs that God alone can satisfy. The longing for acceptance is a God-given desire. Its purpose is to lead us to Him. When we look to Him in faith, we find that we are relentlessly adored, unconditionally accepted, and even greatly liked – quirks and all. (See Hos 2:14-19, Eph 3:12, Zeph 3:17.) On the other hand, looking to people to meet this need will lead to disappointment and conflict.
Third, another person’s opinion does not define us. This may seem obvious, but I have many times internalized a rejection (real or perceived), as if it were true of me. When our identity is built on who God says we are, we can come back to that reality every time we begin to feel otherwise.
Finally, true friendships are based on transparency and acceptance. If we keep our shortcomings hidden, the relationship will not be genuine. We’ll wear ourselves out trying to keep up the charade.
This is, of course, not a “blanket excuse” for hurtful behavior. We shouldn’t excuse sin or selfishness under the guise of “just being myself.” In living authentically, we should never lose sight of grace.
But oh, the freedom of walking confidently in faith. When those shackles of fear start to fall off – what a glorious new beginning! It’s taking place in my life. How about you? How has God helped you overcome people-pleasing? I’d love to learn from your journey!
“This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel says, ‘In repentance and rest is your salvation. In quietness and trust is your strength…’” (Is 30:15).
by MeredithNMills | Dec 10, 2014 | abiding in Christ, rest, Uncategorized
“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light” Matthew 11:28-30.
Overworked, weary, exhausted? Pick me, pick me!
Do those verses resonate within you? They strike a chord deep inside my soul. The word “weary” could also be translated “work to exhaustion.” That is me so much of the time. Exhausted. Worn out. Weary of the treadmill of life. Long nights and even longer days. Have you been there?
And “heavy-laden”- that means “to load up” or “overburden.” Do you feel “loaded up” with burdens, with cares, with responsibilities? It’s just the nature of life to carry burdens. Whatever the job description, responsibilities and “burdens” come with the territory.
A while back, I made a list of the “sea of demands” weighing on me…teaching my kids, preparing meals and snacks, laundry, cleaning, errands, activities, friendships. I should be investing in people outside my home. I should be a fun mom (who doesn’t care if they spill sugar on the floor when they want to help cook.) I should have my kids’ friends over and do crafts with them. I should invite people to our home for dinner. I should have a cleaning routine. I should cook healthier food. I should learn to coupon. I should potty train soon so we can stop paying for diapers. And on top of it all, I should be making time for daily prayer and Bible study. But how, oh how, is one person to do it all?
Into this chaos and craziness comes a gentle invitation. “If you’re weary and overworked, come to Me. I will give you rest.”
It’s interesting to note that He doesn’t confine this invitation to a certain scheduled time of day – “If you come meet with Me every morning, you will find rest.” Instead He invites me to get in the “yoke” with Him, to walk with Him every. single. moment. The picture is that of two animals fastened together, working in sync to pull a cart or a plow. When I am connected to Him , He carries the weight of my burdens. The work He calls me to do, He does with me and through me because I’m in the yoke with Him. (John 15 calls this “abiding in Him”.)
In addition to “taking His yoke,” He invites me to learn from Him. The weight of the plow is made lighter as the two oxen walk in step. Similarly, as I learn to become more like Jesus, I am falling into step with Him.
Of all His attributes, He chose to list here His gentleness and humility. Biblical gentleness is not just a personality trait that comes naturally for some and not for others. It is “that attitude of the spirit in which we accept God’s dealings with us as good and do not dispute or resist…It is a condition of mind and heart that demonstrates gentleness not in weakness but in power. It is a virtue born in strength of character.”* It is “the opposite to self-assertiveness and self-interest. It stems from trust in God’s goodness and control over the situation…This is a work of the Holy Spirit, not of human will (Galatians 5:23).”**
Jesus was gentle and humble. His heart was at rest. As we walk with Him and learn from Him, our hearts can rest, too.
Please don’t misunderstand me. Concentrated, set-aside time alone with Him is vital. We learn of Him and become like Him by studying His Word and talking with Him in prayer. How precious and life-giving is His Word (Psalm 119:97)!
But God is not confined to our alone times with Him. He wants to walk with us and show us how to apply His Word in the moment-by-moment grind of life. He wants all of life to be worship, not just set aside times of singing or studying or praying. His yoke is easy and His burden is light because He carries the weight of it for us! He wants us to rest, even in the midst of life’s struggles. His heart toward us is good. His love for us is unfathomable.
Do you need rest? Come to Jesus. Share His yoke. Learn from Him. And find rest.
*Lexical Aids to the New Testament from the Key Word Study Bible
**Blue Letter Bible Lexicon
