When Life Hurts

When Life Hurts

by Meredith Mills

@DazzledByTheSon

Sometimes life is really hard.

As a nation, we’ve experienced some tragic events lately – from the Las Vegas massacre to hurricanes and wild fires leaving destruction in their wake.

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Closer to home, several dear friends lost loved ones in the last few weeks. We attended one funeral on Saturday – a dearly loved husband and father. Unexpected. Much too soon. Today, my husband played piano for yet another funeral – a beloved wife of nearly 59 years. Still too soon.

So much pain and heartache. Such enormous needs.

Many of us carry “smaller” burdens, concerns we voice to no one. Fears that plague us when we’re all alone. Important to us, nonetheless.

Whether your needs are immense or you carry less-big burdens today, my prayer for you is this:

May you find hope in the presence of God who promises it won’t always be this way.

May His love be a balm to your soul.

May you know the healing power of the One who is also acquainted with grief.

May His nearness be your ever-present comfort.

May He enter your loneliness and whisper words of tender affection.

May He give beauty for your ashes and be the stability of your soul.

May His grace be your lifeline,

His wisdom your next step,

His love the very breath that you breathe.

In Jesus may you find rest and healing for your soul.

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” Ps 46:1.

refuge and strength

What burdens do you carry today? I’d be honored to pray for you – please leave a comment below.

How has God been a refuge and very present help for you in the past?

Related Posts:

When You Need Refuge

It Wasn’t Supposed to be This Way

Calming the Chaos

Calming the Chaos

Bang. Bang. Bang.

My son taps who-knows-what on the floor, enjoying the sounds he creates. He loves noisemaking. I cherish his inquisitive personality, that quality which causes him to make the noises (and the messes).

But these things drive a parent crazy. “Son, stop banging. It’s just creating chaos,” my husband instructs.

Immediately, our preschooler bursts into song. “Chaos! Chaos! Chaos!”

At this point, what do you do except roll your eyes and laugh at the insanity of the situation?

Such craziness typifies our current life season. Noise and chaos, messes and piles, unfinished projects galore. But in the midst of it all, three kids are loving life and exploring the world around them.

Quite honestly, I waffle back and forth between being okay with all this – with embracing exploration while training them to pick up after themselves – and losing my temper or having a panic attack when I can’t find a tidy spot for a few minutes’ reprieve.

I’m thankful God understands.

He stepped from the beauty of heaven into the chaos and disorder of life on our planet. He lived and breathed among us, sometimes meeting people when they came to Him, other times going out of His way to set up a divine encounter.

He came to do His Father’s work, which included more than teaching and preaching. Jesus brought the gospel into everyday life:

He changed His agenda when the multitudes met Him on shore as He was traveling to a secluded getaway spot.

He stopped mid-stride to single out a woman in need of healing, though it required postponing another miracle.

He got up from His nap to calm a raging sea.

We, too, are called to do God’s work. We’ve been chosen to introduce our children to Jesus. Sometimes this means creating intentional times of getting to know God together. Other times it means we embrace moldable moments as they arise.

This calling leads us to get down on the floor and read to them, look at their Lego creations or help them find doodle ideas on Pinterest. We let them help in the kitchen or join our no-longer-quiet devotional times with God. We listen to what’s important to them – even though we were there and saw all the same details of the situation. We put down our devices, look them in the eyes and show our delight in them.

No one does this perfectly, and God doesn’t expect us to. Our kids don’t need perfect parents. They need intentional parents who point them toward a perfect God.

Jesus entered our world to reach us right where we are. We can do that for our kids, too. We can love in the midst of the mess, because people matter more than perfection. We can repurpose ordinary events to teach our kids spiritual truth, because eternity exists all around us. And we can find peace in the midst of it all, because the God of peace lives in our hearts and offers grace for every situation we face.

Here are a few practical tips for calming life’s chaos:

  • Create a calm spot

Life feels more doable when we keep at least one room tidy. In our house, the living room is that space. It provides a retreat for moments when I’m overwhelmed or uptight. (Not that it stays that way. We do live in it, so it gets messy, too. But everyone in the family knows messes shouldn’t be left there.)

  • Run back to Jesus

Sometimes I give myself a “time out.” When the craziness starts making me crazy, a few minutes with Jesus helps me refocus on what’s most important. I tell Him how I’m feeling and listen as He speaks truth over me – reminding me that He understands, that His power is available right now, and that He’s at work in the chaos.

Life gets crazy but thankfully, our God still calms stormy seas and restless hearts.

Raising the White Flag

Raising the White Flag

secret-2725302_1280Lean in close, I have a secret to tell…I am a recovering control freak.”

Seriously.

Life is good when things go according to plan, when nothing too crazy happens, and when people behave themselves. But if things start to veer too far off course, I get anxious.

God has grown me a lot in this area over the last few years, though. I’m learning to raise the white flag, to trust Him and listen to His voice when things seem out of control.

I had an opportunity to practice this recently – with my own sweet child in my very own home.

Read the rest of this story at Just18Summers, where I’m sharing today about parenting and when to raise the white flag of surrender.

 

The Journal

The Journal

Friendship. 

It’s one of the greatest joys and most profound responsibilities of parenting. We have the privilege of cultivating relationships with the children God has given to us.

Read the rest of this article at In The Quiver, where I’m guest posting today – sharing a conversation-sparking tradition that spans three generations. Please stop by for a visit and join the conversation!

Good Gifts Gone Bad

Good Gifts Gone Bad

by Meredith Mills

@DazzledByTheSon

Sometimes you’ve got to give yourself a time out.

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For several months, I’ve been very intentional about writing regularly, trying to post here on a weekly basis. But last week, I chose not to write. At all.

God told me not to.

I had lots of work to do – A book proposal waiting to be revised, a book in process, a weekly blog post, a monthly contribution to Just18Summers and another article to complete by the end of the month.

Clearly, I didn’t have time to take the week off.

But God showed me that writing had become an idol.

An Idol.

It’s a rather church-y word, one that’s lost much of its meaning to modern American Christians. We read about idols throughout the Bible, but they can seem like distant relics of the past or an unfamiliar element of cultures somewhere else in the world.

Maybe we need to rethink the word.

Maybe addiction is more relevant to our modern minds.

Unlike statues of gold, addictions can be much harder to recognize, but they’re just as insidious.

Some addictions are big and ugly and obvious. But most of them aren’t. Most start as good gifts, designed by God for our enjoyment and use.

But they become addictions when we find our identity in them.

When we panic at the thought of losing them – even temporarily.

When we can’t stop thinking about them.

When we look for comfort, peace or healing in them.

When they drive and control us.

That’s what happened with my writing. I had taken it up as a hobby several years ago. It was a refreshing way to process my thoughts and emotions and a means of sharing with others what God is doing in my life.

But I’ve grown to love the feeling of completing a piece and meeting a deadline. I get excited when I hear how God ministered to someone through my words. I enjoy reading comments and feedback.

Those good things, however, took root in my heart and seeped into my identity. They began driving and controlling me like a task-master.

What started as a good gift became an addiction, an idol.

When God showed me this, I asked Him what to do about it. Not all idols can, or even should, be completely discarded. I’ve wrestled with a food addiction for much of my life, but I certainly can’t quit eating.

As I prayed, Jesus reminded me of this verse: “…Take every thought captive to obey Christ” 2 Corinthians 10:4-5

Just as my thoughts need to obey Jesus, the gifts I’ve received need to be under His control as well.

My writing needs to obey Jesus – the time I spend on it, the projects I undertake, the very words I say.

My eating habits should obey Jesus – what I eat, when I eat, how much I eat.

My parenting ought to obey Jesus – how I speak to my kids, the way I train and discipline them, the activities we chose to do as a family.

My role as a wife needs to obey Jesus – how I talk to and about my husband, how I respond to him, the priority I give our relationship.

My people-pleasing personality should obey Jesus, so that His pleasure is my heart’s desire and satisfaction.

My use of time needs to obey Jesus.

Absolutely every area of my life needs to obey Jesus.

Because this is what following Him is all about – my whole self living in full surrender to the God who invites me to find rest in Him. Rest from the idols that drive me, rest from the law that condemns me, rest in Christ’s work and rest in the nearness of God.

While idols and addictions consume those who cling to them, Jesus offers the abundant life for which our souls were created. (See John 10:10.)

How about you? Are there any idols lurking in the shadows of your soul? Any addictions strangling your abundant life?

God loves us too much to let us continue worshiping at the feet of things that will destroy us. Will you bring your idols to Him and let Him show you how to bring them under His control? no idols

I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments! Please respond below.

Related Posts:

Subduing Sin

What’s the Big Deal?

Voices in my Head

Things are Changing Around Here

Not Safe But Good