by MeredithNMills | Nov 10, 2017 | trust, Uncategorized
Frightened. Humbled. Unnerved.
A range of emotions swirled in my heart as I watched the storm rage outside. This hurricane, which had inspired so much fear and left devastation in her wake, Hurricane Irma – she was a mere tropical storm when she reached us. Still, those winds…
The rain fell at a 45 degree angle. We heard trees come down as we braced ourselves for what might come next.
The power flickered nearly a dozen times before finally going out completely. Everything became quiet and still. All we heard was the storm and the sound of each other’s voices.
We had expected to lose power. We were prepared, our kitchen stocked with soup, ramen noodles, trail mix and bottled water.
But as the hours stretched on, time seemed to slow down. Minutes turned into hours and hours into days. Four very long days before the electricity came back on.
Do you know what I missed the most?
Light.
I missed the ability to flip a switch and watch the darkness vanish instantaneously.
Light makes it easier to do the simple stuff – like open a can of soup, or find that utensil I just dropped on the floor, or bathe my child. It prevents stumbling over toys left on the floor. It helps with eating and reading and pretty much everything else daily life requires.
During those four days of darkness, God who is light illuminated some dark corners of my heart. Areas I didn’t realize I felt such a need to control –
- My routine and the smooth running of the day
- The way in which things get done
- When and what we eat
- A whole lot of other daily life details
I guess control is really just an illusion. All it takes is a loss of electricity and suddenly, I’m no longer in control.
But God is, always.
And the longer I know Him, the more I realize that’s a good thing. His heart is kind and full of love. He works everything for the good of His own – even when we can’t see how that’s possible.
When the proverbial reins are taken from our hands, everything slows down and all that’s extraneous gets stripped away. We’re free to look with fresh eyes on the life God has given us.
“How great is Your goodness, which You have stored up for those who fear You…” (Psalm 31:19).
Sometimes life is decidedly not good.
“Little” annoyances can drive us crazy – like four days without electricity. On those days, God offers to carry our burdens so we can rest in His control.
Other times life comes unraveled and the daily pain is excruciating. But God Himself is unchangeably good, even when life is not. He is near to the brokenhearted and invites us to find rest near His heart.
God…Light in our darkness. Sovereign in our craziness. Healer, Sustainer, Miracle worker, the Giver of every good gift.
For what attribute of God are you thankful today? How do you see Him meeting your needs today? In what areas do you need to rest in His control?
I’d love hear! Please leave a comment below.
by MeredithNMills | Nov 7, 2017 | Family, growing in Christ, knowing God
Ding!
A new text message lit up the screen of my iPhone. I opened it to find a long note from my mom containing a list she’s compiled of over 350 names and attributes of God.
The day before she and I had chatted about my fascination with learning God’s names as a means to knowing Him better. She mentioned that she thinks through the alphabet and corresponding names of God as she falls asleep at night. I had asked her to send me the list she’s put together.
When I received the text message the next day, I smiled at this glimpse into her walk with the Lord and realized what a priceless gift she’s given me through her own quietly cultivated heart for Christ. I’ve experienced the impact of her love for Him – both as a child and now as an adult.
A few nights later, my own daughter couldn’t fall asleep…
Read the rest of the story at Just18Summers.com
by MeredithNMills | Oct 31, 2017 | fear, grace, growing in Christ, Hope in the Midst of Heartache, Loneliness, Uncategorized
By Meredith Mills
@DazzledByTheSon
Why, God? Why?
Has that question ever haunted you? Does your faith flounder when life deals a low blow, like our punching bag shuddering before my kids’ Kung Fu fists?
Mine does sometimes, especially when logic goes unsatisfied and cliché answers just won’t do. It’s been one of those seasons for me lately as we’ve grieved with several friends over the loss of beloved family members.
If you, too, wonder why, I invite you into the wrestling match within my soul.
Here are some of the questions I’ve been asking God lately:
——————————————————————
If You are sovereign, as Your Word says You are, why do You sometimes allow horrible things to happen? I get the whole “free will” thing – some people chose to hurt others. And if I’m honest, I hurt others at times, too.
But why accidents? If You are good, as I’ve tasted and seen You are, why don’t You stop them before they occur?
I can’t make sense of this. And my heart is afraid to trust You with my future.
——————————————————————
Oh, the comfort of bringing my restless heart to Jesus and listening as He speaks through His Spirit and His Word. 
God led me to the story of Jesus at Lazarus’ tomb (John 11). Remember that time when He could have stopped His friend from dying, but He didn’t? He didn’t get there in time – on purpose.
I’ve never before noticed the connection between verses five and six. “Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So when He heard that Lazarus was sick, He stayed where He was two more days.”
What?
Because He loved them, He stayed away long enough to let Lazarus die.
That seems utterly illogical. Lazarus’ sisters thought so, too. They both essentially accused Jesus of not loving them because He let their brother die through His tardiness. Divine love often baffles human reason.
Yet Jesus didn’t get angry with their questions or rebuke their boldness. On the contrary, He did something quite the opposite.
Jesus wept (John 11:35).
He knew the miracle He was about to perform – He would command death to release it’s grip on His friend. Within minutes, He would restore Lazarus to life and give him back into his sisters’ arms.
Yet His heart was so deeply moved by His loved ones’ suffering that He, too, wept with them. He felt their pain, and He feels ours, too.
He could have prevented Lazarus’ death, but He saw a bigger picture. Instead, He drew near to the sisters and wept with them.
This is Emmanuel, God with us. Near to the brokenhearted. A very present help in our need (Psalm 34:18, 46:1). The God of comfort restores shattered lives, trades beauty for ashes and replaces heaviness with praise.
He knows the end of our story, too – that for believers in Jesus, death is not the end. One day our suffering will be over. Like Lazarus and his sisters, we will be reunited with those gone before us into heaven.
But Jesus’ knowledge of the future doesn’t prevent Him from feeling our pain in the present or pouring out His comfort in abundant measure. 
After weeping with Mary and Martha, He proved that He Himself is the resurrection and the life. Death has no hold on Him. And one day, it will have no hold on us either.
Until that day, there will be many unanswered questions. Many times we won’t understand or feel the love of God. We’ll have many opportunities to wrestle with Him and choose faith when nothing makes sense, because we’ve found that Jesus alone holds life, hope, healing and peace.
He will set all things right someday.
In the meantime, He is so close, and His nearness is our good.
How has God walked you through wrestling matches of the soul? I’d love to hear – please leave a comment below.
Related posts:
When Life Hurts
When Life Eclipses God
Shields are not Just for Superheroes
A Good Good Father
by MeredithNMills | Oct 24, 2017 | abiding in Christ, Family, grace, growing in Christ, knowing God, Uncategorized, Walking by Faith
By Meredith Mills
@DazzledByTheSon
Yesterday was not a good day.
Everyone in the Mills house woke up tired from a busy weekend. And busy weekends make for long Mondays.
The kids and I took a field trip which involved a lovely nature walk in the autumn-colored woods. An impending thunderstorm held off and the temperature was perfect.
The humidity, however, was intense. I wore rain boots instead of hiking boots so by the halfway point, I was exhausted. That halfway point happened to be at the bottom of a hill and the hike back seemed much longer than the hike in.
After a morning of learning about wildlife and preservation efforts, we headed home where a messy house greeted us and screamed of work that needed to be done. My afternoon to-do list didn’t include all the kiddo needs that arose, and I failed to handle those “interruptions” with grace.
It was not a good day.
As I look back on it, however, I see much for which to be thankful, so many things to slow down and savor, even in the chaos of the day.
Surely I could have done better.
But I didn’t. I didn’t live the day well.
Maybe it’s because I neglected to keep coming back to Jesus. I forgot that on my own I can’t do better. I can’t chose patience, grace or gratitude without staying connected to Christ, without yielding my heart and expectations to Him in each moment.
“And He will be the stability of your times, a wealth of salvation, wisdom and knowledge. The fear of the Lord is his treasure” Isaiah 33:6.
Underneath the shifting sands of emotional ups and downs, God is the bedrock for our souls. He offers the stability of His unchanging heart and faithfulness of character.
He’s the steady Source of everything I need in every moment – salvation from the sins that tempt me, wisdom when I don’t know how to parent, knowledge of His heart when I lose sight of His face – all these things in abundant measure.
In big struggles and little frustrations, God understands. He offers wisdom and grace for each one – and new mercies with every rising sun.
Stability in unstable times – this is God our treasure.
How has God been your stability this week? In what ways do you need Him to be your unchanging Rock today? Please comment below – I’d love to hear.
Related Posts:
When Life Blindsides You
Lessons from my Old Guitar
What I Learned from the Kid Who Fell Out of the Car
by MeredithNMills | Oct 10, 2017 | fear, Hope in the Midst of Heartache, knowing God, Loneliness, Uncategorized, Waiting, Walking by Faith
by Meredith Mills
@DazzledByTheSon
Sometimes life is really hard.
As a nation, we’ve experienced some tragic events lately – from the Las Vegas massacre to hurricanes and wild fires leaving destruction in their wake.
Closer to home, several dear friends lost loved ones in the last few weeks. We attended one funeral on Saturday – a dearly loved husband and father. Unexpected. Much too soon. Today, my husband played piano for yet another funeral – a beloved wife of nearly 59 years. Still too soon.
So much pain and heartache. Such enormous needs.
Many of us carry “smaller” burdens, concerns we voice to no one. Fears that plague us when we’re all alone. Important to us, nonetheless.
Whether your needs are immense or you carry less-big burdens today, my prayer for you is this:
May you find hope in the presence of God who promises it won’t always be this way.
May His love be a balm to your soul.
May you know the healing power of the One who is also acquainted with grief.
May His nearness be your ever-present comfort.
May He enter your loneliness and whisper words of tender affection.
May He give beauty for your ashes and be the stability of your soul.
May His grace be your lifeline,
His wisdom your next step,
His love the very breath that you breathe.
In Jesus may you find rest and healing for your soul.
“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” Ps 46:1.
What burdens do you carry today? I’d be honored to pray for you – please leave a comment below.
How has God been a refuge and very present help for you in the past?
Related Posts:
When You Need Refuge
It Wasn’t Supposed to be This Way
