by MeredithNMills | Feb 12, 2019 | Family, grace, growing in Christ, knowing God, Uncategorized, Victorious Living, Walking by Faith
Sometimes I just can’t control my tongue.
It was not a good day. For whatever reason, we were just off. I was irritable and impatient. I found myself correcting every little infraction, every childish noise. The more I corrected, the more frustrated I became. And the more my kids acted up.
After snapping at one of my children, I realized I needed help. This downward spiral was not going to improve without divine intervention.
“Lord, please help me control my tongue!”
As I whispered the prayer, the following verse came to mind: “…What you say flows from what is in your heart” (Luke 6:45b, NLT).
My shoulders slumped. If restraining my tongue is a difficult job, changing my heart is impossible. I’ve tried unsuccessfully to do it for many years.
Discouragement gave way to hope, however, as I remembered God is more than able to do just that. His power is infinitely greater than my sin. In love, He pointed out the root of my tongue troubles, not to condemn me, but to show the deeper level on which He wants to work (see Romans 8:1 and 1 John 1:9).
“Lord, change my heart, so love and grace can flow out of me.” My prayer had changed, just as my heart was changing.
Are you struggling to control your tongue today? Be encouraged. God is willing and able to change the heart out of which your mouth speaks. Here are some things to keep in mind:
Ask God to show you the root of your struggle. I’ve realized I become most irritable when I feel out of control – like when the house is a mess and company is coming over and I can’t keep my kids focused on their chores. Or when I just want the day to run smoothly so I’m not inconvenienced or made uncomfortable.
God wants to deal with sin, not merely on the behavior level, but at its core. Once we realize why our tongues are out of control, we can pray for heart change in those specific areas. We’re also more equipped to recognize these heart issues early on, before our tongues take control.
Last week, I became increasingly frustrated during a family chore time. God reminded me that I didn’t have to control the situation, that if my friends arrived before the house was clean, it was okay. As I surrendered to His control, my heart calmed down and my tongue stayed in check.
As parents, it’s easy to focus on things in our kids’ lives which need correction. While correction is essential, our children also need abundant affirmation and praise. They need us to notice their effort, to applaud them for making the hard choice to do right, to affirm the work of God we see in their lives. They need to know we are for them. That we love them and enjoy them and would choose them out of all the kids in the world. God can help us see the good He wants us to affirm in our kids – we just have to ask Him.
The tongue may be impossible to tame, but our God is able to do the impossible. As we allow Him to change our hearts, we’ll notice a drastic change in our tongues, as well as in our parenting.
by MeredithNMills | Sep 11, 2018 | abiding in Christ, Family, grace, growing in Christ, Identity in Christ, knowing God, serving, Uncategorized, Victorious Living, Walking by Faith
And just like that, summer is over.
Summer vacation, that is. The heat is forecasted to stick with us for a while yet. The kids are back to their studies and our weekly routine is becoming more…routine.
I’m not sure what happened to the lazy days of summer, but we didn’t see many of them this year. All three kids swam on our neighborhood swim team and had a blast. A six-times-a-week blast. Then our son started cross country with one, then two, now three practices a week. There were other activities as well, like VBS and STEM camp and playdates.
While the kids were busy, I spent a lot of time writing and even tackled a few painting projects. Our summer was definitely full.
But as the school year approached and I went into prep mode for our homeschool and co-op, I realized life was about to get even busier.
Not going to lie – I’ve had a few meltdowns trying to keep up with everything. One night I jolted awake, gasping for breath as I realized I was in the middle of a panic attack. It seemed strange, because I wasn’t mentally worried about anything. Yet the emotional stress of trying to juggle all my responsibilities was taking its toll.
The irony of my current writing project has not escaped my notice. I mean, really. I’m writing a book on soul rest. It seems I may have picked the wrong topic.
Until I remember that I’m writing it because I’m learning it.
Rest is on my heart because God’s teaching me to rest it in the middle of our everyday crazy. Things may not slow down, at least not for long. But Jesus’ invitation to “come rest” remains unchanged in each life season.
Here are a few things He’s teaching me on this crazy, busy road:
- Soul rest takes returning
“Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you” (Psalm 116:7). In the busyness, it’s easy to become unsettled. To grow restless when life feels out of control or when our insides are knotted up for one reason or another.
Living from a heart of rest requires a choice – a conscious decision to cling to faith over feelings, to let God draw us back to Himself as our Source of peace.
The psalmist found rest in remembering God and we can, too. Right in the middle of life’s crazy, without waiting for things to calm down, we must remind our hearts of who God is:
- He is abundantly good, even when life isn’t.
- He responds to my prayers.
- He is gracious, compassionate, and faithful.
- He is infinitely powerful.
- He’ll never call me where His grace won’t sustain me.
- He’s already provided, in Jesus, everything I need to live the life to which He’s called me.
- He loves me unconditionally and welcomes me to come running – freely, boldly, to Him.
- He is, and always will be, for me.
The bottom line, I’m learning, is that soul rest is a walk of faith.
Whether I’m sitting at His feet in prayer or driving my kids to yet another lesson or practice, I can rest fully and freely in my relationship with Jesus. He never changes and His definition of me is constant, too.
When you know you’re relentlessly loved and fully accepted, life gets a whole lot easier.
That is the reality for every follower of Jesus. Will you join me in resting in this truth today?
How do you practice soul rest? I’d love to hear – please comment below to join the conversation! Or click here to join my email group and receive access to all the Bible Study printables in my free resource library.
by MeredithNMills | Jul 25, 2018 | Family, grace, parenting, Uncategorized
Saturday is our family’s favorite day of the week.
From Sunday through Friday, we’re busy with school, work, church, sports, music, playdates, and the general busyness which accompanies family life.
But on Saturday, we take a breath.
We eat waffles for breakfast and the kids listen to radio adventures on a local Christian station. Most Saturdays, very little gets done until at least lunchtime. Sometimes the whole day is “unproductive” (as far as my to-do list is concerned).
But in reality, a lot happens on Saturday.
Not easily measured, the benefits of the day are experienced on the soul level. Our kids travel to faraway lands on imaginary explorations. My husband and I have time to just talk. I catch up on snuggles with my littlest and she often joins me in spending time with God.
On occasion, life redirects our Saturday routine. A swim meet or birthday party may call us away from home. Some Saturdays are as full as the rest of the week. But in general, we protect the day like any other appointment on our calendar.
Because Saturdays keep us going and refill us for the week ahead.
In our busy culture where productivity is king, our bodies and souls cry out for rest. We aren’t designed to toil endlessly day after day. Rest is a gift from God, often stolen from us by the tyranny of the urgent. Yet our Creator invites us to be still and breathe and savor the things which feed our souls and enrich our lives.
Here are some thoughts on making room for rest:
Routines vary from family to family and from one life season to another. An entire day may be impossible to block off in your week. Brainstorm as a family some ways you can carve out times of refreshment and togetherness. Whatever you decide upon, make sure to schedule it on your family calendar.
I have a friend whose family does pizza and a movie at home every Friday night. At the end of a long week, it’s a great way to unwind and enjoy being together.
If your family likes to play games, you could declare one night of the week or month as “family game night.”
Reading aloud is also a great way to relax together. Our current favorite is The Green Ember series.
Look for family outing opportunities. We recently loaded everyone in the minivan and drove for an hour without telling the kids where we were going. Anticipation mounted as we neared the zoo for an after-hours members’ night. We had a blast watching animals that aren’t normally active during the day as we savored unhurried moments together.
Too quickly these days are becoming memories. Let’s make time for rest as we enjoy the people entrusted to us by the Giver of all good things.
Knock Knock
Ministry That Doesn’t Look Like Ministry
Raising the White Flag
by MeredithNMills | Jul 17, 2018 | abiding in Christ, freedom, friendship, grace, growing in Christ, knowing God, rest, Uncategorized, Walking by Faith
Sometimes I get distracted.
Sunday night, hubby came home from a week-long business convention in Pennsylvania. We stayed busy while he was gone – the big kids went to STEM camp each day, our littlest enjoyed several play dates with her besties, and I wrote lots and lots of words. When the weekend rolled around, we were all more than ready for Daddy to be home.
Except that I wasn’t ready when he got home.
Dinner wasn’t done. The bathroom deep clean that had exploded into our bedroom wasn’t… well, cleaned up. The laundry sat where I’d left it, waiting to be put on hangers and hung in the closet.
How I wanted everything to be perfect when he walked in the door. But alas, real life got in the way.
And guess what? He didn’t care.
He just wanted to be with us. To hear about our week and tell us about his. To snuggle up close and enjoy the evening together.
As I bustled about the kitchen trying to hurry the cooking along, I remembered the story of another woman with whose life I so often relate.
Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her” Luke 10:38-42.
I so get Martha! She loved Jesus and wanted everything to be perfect for Him. That meal in the oven was an expression of her affection. She longed to make Him comfortable, to help Him feel at home.
Yet all Jesus wanted was her.
Her heart, her focus, her devotion – not shown through works done in His name, but through responding to His loving pursuit.
In contrast to restless Martha, there sat Mary — the picture of a quiet heart.
Yeah, there were unfinished chores to be done. But Jesus had arrived, and she had to be near Him.
Serving from a distance just would not do.
If He was sitting in the living room, that’s where Mary wanted to be. If He went to the dining room, you’d find her there. If He walked outside, she’d join Him there, too.
Mary was preoccupied with Jesus.
The Bible mentions this Mary several other times – once at Lazarus’ tomb, where she brought her grief to Jesus just before He raised her brother from the dead, and again at a dinner party, where she anointed His feet with expensive perfume as an act of worship*.
In both scenarios, Mary went where Jesus was. She loved Him and needed Him, so she ran to Him with zero hesitation.
Oh, God, give me such a heart! May I never be content with days full of service yet absent of connection with You. Teach me to cultivate Your presence, both in my “daily quiet times” and in middle of my everyday crazy. 
How about you? How do you practice the presence of God? In what ways do you cultivate a quiet heart? I’d love to hear – please leave a comment below!
Related Posts:
Rest For the Restless
On Rest and Quiet Time
*John 11:32, John 12:1-3
by MeredithNMills | May 16, 2018 | grace, growing in Christ, hope, Identity in Christ, Uncategorized, Waiting, Walking by Faith
Well, hello there. It’s been a while.
I’ve written a lot over the last few months but have been a bit absent here. Let me fill you in.
In February, I took a break from blogging, sharing here only what I wrote for Just18Summers. Discouragement and self-imposed deadlines had turned my writing journey into a burden, where once it had been a delight.
I spent some time asking God to refine my focus, to clarify the underlying passion He’s placed in my soul, to define the driving force behind every word I write.
Why am I writing?
What am I trying to say?
What change has God brought in my life over the last few years which could transform my readers’ lives as well?
What does He want to communicate using my voice and my story?
A single word surfaced as I prayed.
Rest.
Funny, rest has been the theme of this blog for over a year because it really is, I now realize, the singular passion of my soul. But I wasn’t living or writing from that place of soul rest.
So God took me back to the path we’ve walked together. He showed me again the restlessness in which I once lived and the brokenness I experienced when I could no longer keep up with life. Like it was yesterday, I remember the day when my self-sufficiency bowed to His lavish grace (Confessions of a Good Girl).
On that path five years ago, I discovered the rest which comes from trusting Jesus’ merits instead of my own – not just for salvation, but for day-to-day walking with God. From knowing and loving Him. From drawing near to Christ and staying there in the dailyness of life.
My soul learned to breathe as I experienced the beauty of His heart and the wonder of being His own accepted child.
After God reminded me of our history together, I realized some things had to change. I needed to return to rest (Psalm 116:7) — in life in general, and writing in particular. I asked God to show me how to balance the various callings He’s given me as a wife and mommy, teacher, writer, church member, etc.
During this time, I’ve mulled over what it means to truly live each day from a heart of rest. Because let’s just be honest. Normal life is anything but restful.
I keep coming back to the story of Mary sitting at Jesus’ feet while Martha bustled around her (Luke 10:38-42). Mary’s ability to rest in the middle of chaos intrigues me. Jesus’ words to a frantic Martha ring in my heart: “You are worried and upset about many things, but a few things are needed – or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:41-42, NIV, emphasis mine).
What was this one thing which enabled Mary to rest?
As I’ve pondered and prayed over that question, a new book project began taking shape in my mind, one which provides the framework and heart behind the devotional I started last summer (Things are Changing Around Here). This new book discusses in detail the one thing that’s essential to living from a heart of rest.
So I now have two books in process and two book proposals nearly complete.
Will you pray with me about these projects?
- That God will continue teaching me to have a heart of rest
- That I’ll live from that place as I write these books
- That He’ll open doors to share these projects with industry professionals and provide an avenue for publication, if that’s His purpose at this time
- That I’ll be sensitive as His Spirit guides me through this process
Here at Dazzled By The Son, we’ll continue looking at various attributes of our God and how we can rest, by faith, in who He is. I’d love for you to join me in this discussion!
What quality of God is most meaningful to you?
What quality of God most confuses you?
Let’s talk about it!
Related Posts:
Rest for the Restless
On Rest and Quiet Time
by MeredithNMills | Feb 20, 2018 | Family, grace, ministry, Uncategorized, Walking by Faith
“Mama, you forgot to sing to me,” my son called from his bedroom.
Actually, I hadn’t forgotten. I was just tired and ready for the kids to be in bed, eager to go “off duty” for the night. So I had prayed for him, kissed him goodnight and shut the door.
But he remembered.
And inwardly, my heart rejoiced despite my weariness. I reentered his room, sang a verse of “The Old Rugged Cross” and kissed him goodnight one more time.
Read the rest of this story over at Just18Summers.
