“I’m writing a note to God,” my preschooler announces proudly.
She thoughtfully scribbles her message on a 3×5 card, then opens the hinged lid of our ”Blessing Box” and adds her note to the jumbled mess of index cards. It looks disorderly, even confusing, but to me it’s a beautiful mess.
Each of those mismatched cards is a record of something important to us – a three-year old’s note to God, a list of things we’re thankful for, a prayer request and its subsequent answer.
I wish I could say we are systematic in adding cards to our blessing box. I wish I could tell you how often we take it out and read its contents. But, alas, this busy mama is far less organized and consistent than I like to admit.
Despite my unfulfilled great intentions, however, there it sits on my grandmother’s hutch in our bustling dining room—a constant reminder to count our many blessings, an ever-present invitation to recall the faithfulness of God.
We add to it at random. We open it up and read on occasion.
Like the other night when my oldest daughter put the box on the table before dinner. She gave each of us a blank card and instructed us write something for which we are thankful. Then she passed around the box for us to drop in our card and pick out another to read aloud.
Or the other morning when the kids and I all had bad attitudes and needed to reflect on God’s good gifts—our family and friends, an air-conditioned home, clothes and shoes, food and clean water, and the fact that Jesus loves children (my three-year-old’s contribution). Our focus shifted as we remembered the good things we’ve been given.
Or that season a while back when money was tight and work was slow. I recorded a very specific prayer request for provision and was thrilled to record God’s answer the very next day.
Many a memory is preserved in our treasured blessing box.
Do you have a place to record things for which you’re thankful? In case you’d like to create your own blessing box, here’s how we did it:
Choose a box – I picked one that fit our décor, because I planned for it to have a permanent home in a prominent location. I love the hinged lid because it’s easy for little hands to open (and can’t get lost!)
Stock up on pens and index or thankfulness cards. — We keep these in a nearby drawer so they’re always handy when we have something to record.
Get everyone involved — Our family knows that anyone can add to or read from our blessing box at any time.
This has been a great tool for us in cultivating gratitude and making memories as a family.
How do you count your blessings? I’d love to hear — please leave a comment below!
The question tugged at the corners of my soul as I trudged through each day. A dark cloud hovered over every waking moment. And sleep? That was a struggle, too. I had one bed-wetter and another child with night-terrors, so the sleep I did get was often fragmented and restless.
How I hated mornings. I dreaded facing a new day.
How can I be a good mom when I feel so sad, so weary, so…depressed?
Numbness presided over my heart. Things that used to bring joy now seemed empty and hollow. Routine tasks overwhelmed me with paralyzing force. I didn’t want to go out, didn’t want to do fun activities with my kids and especially didn’t want to talk about how I was really feeling.
Depression carries such a stigma. If I admitted my daily struggle, I feared people would see me as weak or unspiritual. They might lecture or give unhelpful help. They might judge me.
Oh, what a prison depression can be. It’s like walking through a deep, dark valley with insurmountable cliffs towering high above, blocking out any ray of light or hope for escape.
I’ve spent time there and come out the other side. May I share with you what I learned?
Get real with God.
Jesus calls Himself “the God of hope” and invites us to pour out our hearts to Him.
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” Romans 15:13 ESV
“Trust in Him at all times, O people. Pour out your heart before Him. God is a refuge for us.” Psalm 62:8 ESV
His heart is kind and full of compassion, not condemnation. He can handle our pain and is not disappointed when we struggle. He is still a miracle worker and healer of hearts.
Let others in.
It’s hard to own this struggle, but admitting our need and asking for help is a huge step in the healing process. Maybe it’s a trusted friend or a prayer group that can lift us up before God. Maybe it’s a doctor who can evaluate things from a medical perspective.
Do something for yourself.
This may sound selfish, but sometimes it’s the healthiest, most unselfish thing we can do. We can’t pour into the lives of others if our own tank is on empty. Find something that gives you rest, even enjoyment, and make room for that in your life.
Progress, not perfection.
The day may seem daunting, the job overwhelming. Instead of striving for perfection, aim for progress and rejoice in each step.
Our God is patient as He forms Christ in us. He is not in a hurry, nor is He disappointed that we’re not further down the road to recovery. Becoming like Jesus is a life-long process that God is committed to completing.
“And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6 ESV
Depression is a cruel companion, but it does not define us. We are not helpless victims, but treasured children of an all-powerful God. He is always close at hand and has made us more than conquerors through His unconditional love.
For several months, I’ve been very intentional about writing regularly, trying to post here on a weekly basis. But last week, I chose not to write. At all.
God told me not to.
I had lots of work to do – A book proposal waiting to be revised, a book in process, a weekly blog post, a monthly contribution to Just18Summers and another article to complete by the end of the month.
Clearly, I didn’t have time to take the week off.
But God showed me that writing had become an idol.
An Idol.
It’s a rather church-y word, one that’s lost much of its meaning to modern American Christians. We read about idols throughout the Bible, but they can seem like distant relics of the past or an unfamiliar element of cultures somewhere else in the world.
Maybe we need to rethink the word.
Maybe addiction is more relevant to our modern minds.
Unlike statues of gold, addictions can be much harder to recognize, but they’re just as insidious.
Some addictions are big and ugly and obvious. But most of them aren’t. Most start as good gifts, designed by God for our enjoyment and use.
But they become addictions when we find our identity in them.
When we panic at the thought of losing them – even temporarily.
When we can’t stop thinking about them.
When we look for comfort, peace or healing in them.
When they drive and control us.
That’s what happened with my writing. I had taken it up as a hobby several years ago. It was a refreshing way to process my thoughts and emotions and a means of sharing with others what God is doing in my life.
But I’ve grown to love the feeling of completing a piece and meeting a deadline. I get excited when I hear how God ministered to someone through my words. I enjoy reading comments and feedback.
Those good things, however, took root in my heart and seeped into my identity. They began driving and controlling me like a task-master.
What started as a good gift became an addiction, an idol.
When God showed me this, I asked Him what to do about it. Not all idols can, or even should, be completely discarded. I’ve wrestled with a food addiction for much of my life, but I certainly can’t quit eating.
As I prayed, Jesus reminded me of this verse: “…Take every thought captive to obey Christ”2 Corinthians 10:4-5
Just as my thoughts need to obey Jesus, the gifts I’ve received need to be under His control as well.
My writing needs to obey Jesus – the time I spend on it, the projects I undertake, the very words I say.
My eating habits should obey Jesus – what I eat, when I eat, how much I eat.
My parenting ought to obey Jesus – how I speak to my kids, the way I train and discipline them, the activities we chose to do as a family.
My role as a wife needs to obey Jesus – how I talk to and about my husband, how I respond to him, the priority I give our relationship.
My people-pleasing personality should obey Jesus, so that His pleasure is my heart’s desire and satisfaction.
My use of time needs to obey Jesus.
Absolutely every area of my life needs to obey Jesus.
Because this is what following Him is all about – my whole self living in full surrender to the God who invites me to find rest in Him. Rest from the idols that drive me, rest from the law that condemns me, rest in Christ’s work and rest in the nearness of God.
While idols and addictions consume those who cling to them, Jesus offers the abundant life for which our souls were created. (See John 10:10.)
How about you? Are there any idols lurking in the shadows of your soul? Any addictions strangling your abundant life?
God loves us too much to let us continue worshiping at the feet of things that will destroy us. Will you bring your idols to Him and let Him show you how to bring them under His control?
I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments! Please respond below.
“Please don’t let me mess up. Help me not to make a mistake.”
I stood in front of our church congregation, filling in as a member of the worship team. I would be leading out on the next song. My stomach was in knots as I thought through all that could possibly go wrong, things that have gone wrong in the past.
I could forget the words. My voice could crack. I could miss that high note.
Listening to the song’s intro (my heart obviously not worshiping), I realized something quite convicting – I’m quick to admit I’m not perfect. I talk about transparency and the importance of being real, of extending grace in our weaknesses and laughing at our embarrassing moments.
But I don’t like people to see me make mistakes. I want to control which imperfections they observe.
It’s one thing to talk about our mistakes and embarrassments, even our sins, in the past tense. It’s another matter to mess up when people are watching.
For most of my life, I’ve aimed at perfection. It seems a worthy pursuit. Jesus Himself said, “You are to be perfect as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48).
When the Bible uses this word perfect, however, it has the connotation of completeness and maturity.
This term “can be used in a relative or absolute sense…God’s perfection is absolute; man’s is relative reaching the goal set for Him by God with each individual different according to one’s God-given ability.” – Lexical Aids to the New Testament, Key Word Study Bible
God is perfect. He’s sinless and holy. He needs and lacks nothing.
We, His children, on the other hand, are in the process of becoming perfect and mature. We’ve been declared righteous and our sins have been washed away. Yet the Holy Spirit is about the lifelong work of forming Christ in us – and He’s not in a hurry.
True perfection, like all of Christianity, revolves around Jesus, not our own efforts to keep a good image or avoid mistakes. Jesus is our example, as well as our Source of transformation. He uses even our weaknesses to mature us and make us like Christ. (See 2 Corinthians 12:9-10.)
So today, instead of focusing on myself and the image I want to maintain, I choose to rejoice in the work God is doing in my heart, my life and my home.
How about you? How is Jesus perfecting you these days?
I was a slave, bound by my own desires and cravings. Food was my master and I regularly did its bidding. Hungry or not, it didn’t matter. Delicious food or mediocre, it didn’t matter. I couldn’t stop myself. I was powerless to change.
And I hated it.
Guilt, shame, even despair, clung to my soul like my kids’ backpacks on the first day of school.
Here’s the crazy thing – I knew Jesus. This isn’t a pre-salvation story. I’d been a Christian for years. I knew the right answers:
Christ in me is greater than the evil one (1 John 4:4).
I’m more than a conquerer through Jesus who loves me (Romans 8:37).
Sin shouldn’t have dominion over me, since I’m living under grace now (Romans 6:14).
But that’s where it stopped – in my head. New year’s resolutions, diets, shaming myself…none of it worked.
Finally, in desperation, I literally cried out to God. I remember two different nights, sobbing on my knees before Him, admitting my helplessness and begging Him to set me free.
And He did.
Not in an instant, but over time. He taught me to think differently and began transforming me on an emotional and spiritual level. I learned to recognize His voice as He talked to my heart, saying things like “You’ve had enough food” or “That’s a healthier choice.”
He satisfied me with Himself as He broke the chains of addictive sin.
And that’s what He’s willing to do in each sin struggle we face.
“You will again have compassion on us, and will subdue all our iniquities. You will cast all our sins into the depth of the sea” (Micah7:19 NKJV).
He takes captive those things that once held us captive. He makes them subservient to Himself.
And He flings those sins into the deepest depths of the ocean.
Kinda takes the sting out of temptation, doesn’t it?
It’s nice to know when we feel like we have to give in, our feelings are lying to us.
If we’re being real, though, we’d probably all admit victory is not an everyday reality. The above story happened years ago and honestly, I still struggle to obey Jesus in the realm of eating, though the addictive hold has been broken. It’s a battle I’ll most likely take with me to the grave. (I think of it as my ever-present reminder that I still need Jesus.)
But I know now that I don’t have to sin.
I know that “freedom to do whatever I want” isn’t true freedom at all.
And I know I want Jesus to be my Master – not self and sin. Jesus is good and kind, unlike the sin that seeks to destroy me. Jesus carries my burdens with me. He equips me for this spiritual battle and doesn’t leave me defenseless or alone.
He never meets me with condemnation, even when I fail, but rather with the mercy that triumphed at Calvary. He is instantly ready to pick me up, to redeem the mess I’ve made and help me move forward.
This life of freedom is a process. We must learn to walk with Jesus, to recognize His voice and trust that His heart for us is good. It takes practice to rely on Him for the strength (and sometimes the desire) we need to step out in faith.
There are no methods that can take the place of relating to Jesus – not even the spiritual disciplines.
Seriously.
Reading my Bible didn’t set me free.
Praying didn’t break sin’s hold on me.
Telling lots of people about Jesus didn’t inoculate me from addictive sin.
Nope. All of those things are empty when we look to them as our source and hope.
The Pharisees did all those things, but they missed Jesus and remained unchanged.
Walking in victory isn’t a matter of mustering the strength to obey or setting up strong enough “fences” to keep us on the straight and narrow. Nothing but an ever-deepening walk with Jesus can transform our hearts.
And yes, that does include the irreplaceable spiritual disciplines mentioned above. These and other disciplines are essential tools for knowing Him. But they are not the source of change – Jesus is.
What are you facing today? Does a particular sin hold you in its grip? May you find freedom in the nearness of Jesus, in acknowledging your powerlessness and in surrendering anew to the love of Jesus.
In what areas has Jesus set you free? I’d love to hear – please leave a comment below!